Simply US: Part Deux: Run. Bike. Run

I wish Brenna could sit here and type this blog entry. She is amazing and had a conquering spirit today as she completed her first duathlon! I couldn't be prouder of her than I am at this moment.

     Waking Bre up this morning in no way prepared me for the moments ahead of me. For 6:30am in the morning, Brenna woke up pretty easy and seemed pretty happy. It definitely helped the morning go smoothy; although there were a hundred details to attend to that could have easily derailed that (having to get gas, get Brenna breakfast, finding Brenna's tires flat and having to blow up Brenna's tires, putting the bike in the car, etc). On the way to the race an hour away, Brenna and I had a great conversation. She had just completed family life at school and I asked her if she had any questions....and she was off, telling me all of the funny stories of the week, the embarrassing moments, and all of the questions people asked. Before I knew it we had arrived.
     It was then, then that Bre started to say she didn't want to do the duathlon. What? I wasn't sure where this was coming from. She hadn't said a word to me before this and hadn't seemed bothered at all by anything this morning. Trust me, I'm usually the first to clue into Brenna's emotions, because in those moments, we are not like oil and vinegar, we are like dynomite and a match. We can really push each other's buttons! Nope, had no inkling. I told her that we were already there and she was going to do it. I really didn't know what to say, but that's what I said. And even though she was unhappy, she didn't fight it. And then...we took her bike out of the car and her back tire was flat...again. I was kicking myself for not having gotten it tuned up this week. But it was too late for what ifs and shoulda done's. So, luckily, I was seriously thanking my lucky stars, we were able to pump up the bike with the pump we had brought from home! I was hoping that it would last long enough to make it through the race!
     We got her shirt and entry packet and proceeded to the transition area to put her bike away. With the "run in" sign and "bike out" signs we saw, we were a little confused as to where the course was! I knew this couldn't be helping Brenna at all!
And then I knew lightning was going to strike me down! We had forgotten Brenna's helmet! Who does that? First timers, that's who, people!! I completely forgot her darn helmet. She might get her wish after all. I went to a volunteer and asked if there were any extra helmets! Yes, I'm an idiot and I forgot the most essential safety equipment! Yes, I have Mom of the Year written all over me! But they actually had one! The angels were singing.
And then I saw the tears! Oh heaven help me! More than the fighting and arguing that was going to be my undoing. Bre seemed to be in genuine distress and I wasn't sure why. She tearfully pleaded with me to go home....please. She said it was cold, and yes it was cold, but that couldn't be what this was all about. I really was struggling..I didn't want to get all the way up there and then turn around (I would rather have stayed in my bed from the very beginning). I stood with her in indecision and didn't know what to do....
     At that moment, a volunteer from the race began to call all of the kids over for the duathlon. Brenna really did look like the oldest one there. I think she clued into that before I did and that was also a part of her reticence. However, I did spot about three girls her age and made sure to point them out to her.
     If I had to venture a guess, I would say that not really knowing what to do or expect, not having anyone to do it with, the cold of the wind, having had to ask for a helmet, and the fact that she was the oldest really made her not want to be there. With the volunteer calling us over and explaining the course for the race, however, there was this movement and that was all we needed for Brenna to realize she was doing it; she couldn't give in to the doubts in her head.
     All to soon, before I was ready, the race started. Brenna was in the middle of the pack. However, her natural exuberance for running and her competitiveness won out and she was off! She quickly passed most of the kids in front of her. I thought she would be ok, but knew that the transition from running to biking would be critical to how she had felt about herself and herself in the race. Earlier, she had told me she wanted to do the transitions alone, but when she was having trouble with her helmet, I had to help her. I grabbed her bike, handed it to her, and she was off. I told I loved her and I saw a small gesture that resembled a smile come out of her. I'll take it!! Her tire looked fine for the start of it and I prayed that it would be fine through the rest of her 2 mile trip!
     This was the most excruciating part of the race for me. Running and Brenna are synonymous. Brenna and biking...not so much. Whatever happened, I wanted her attitude to be positive and knew that she could handle anything if she stayed positive. I had so many scenarios in my head! I saw her walking her bike in, I saw her throwing her bike down and simply walking away from the race. She handled it way less dramatically than I was! In typical Brenna style, she kicked butt and rode like the wind! I literally jumped up and down when I saw her coming in on her bike! She had done it. I knew that was the last obstacle to her potential dramatic ending. She came riding in at 12:21 (amazing), took off her helmet, handed it to me and then she was off returning from the way she had come to run her .75 miles!
     I was surprised to catch her walking at one point. I don't actually know how long she walked for, but I yelled out "run, Bren, run." I quickly told myself to stop that because really it wasn't about winning, it was about overcoming whatever was making her want to quit before the race to completing the best race she could!
    A short time later, I saw her coming in. There were only about 3 boys ahead of her. She was going to be the first girl! I was so impressed with her. And when I saw that her time was 19:09, I wanted to burst with happiness. I thought that was a great time, because she not only had to overcome the pysicality of it, but her own emotional obstacles! I gave her the biggest hug, bursting with sheer happiness! I could tell she had conquered her mood and was happy for herself as well! Love that girl!
     To celebrate, we went to breakfast at Cracker Barrel and went shopping at the outlets, where I bought clothes for the boys and shoes for Brenna! Her favorite words to me all day were, "Mom, can we go shopping, I want to spend more time with you!" I will take that any day of the week and twice on Sunday! Love that girl with all of my heart! I couldn't be prouder of you Bre for what you did today! You made yourself a stronger, more beautiful version of who you were then when you woke up today!